Tahira Barlord
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Theme song

Slow me down- Emmy Rossum

Background

Tahira is officially the youngest out of her siblings, Taini’s journey Backwhen having cemented this fact, parting the age difference between the twins further than the ten minutes Taini had on Tahira previously. Tahira was trained in the same things as her siblings, the art of fighting and so forth, having excelled in knife play as well as close-combat.

She led a rather insignificant life until she met Veronika, lover to her brother Toncho and in Tahira’s eyes the coolest person ever. Veronika took Tahira under her wing and mentored Tahira until she disappeared on Southern Bolls’ beaches, stolen away by pirates.

Five Turns later, give or take a few sevenday, she managed to escape, however had taken on an alter-ego named Sparrow. This alter-ego lived in Ista after escaping during a gather and eventually took a position as a Barmaid with the Broken Staircase, Threndon becoming her ‘Master’ as a point for her to anchor herself too emotionally. The eventual search for Tessas who had gone missing brought Sparrow and Tahira careening into each other, Tahira shocked out of her fugue by the appearance of her mother. Tahira had created deaths for each of her family members in order to adapt to her situation. The likelihood of her escaping, let alone not dying, left little hope to ever see them again, thus their pseudo-deaths gave her peace to move on without them.

She continued to work at the Broken Staircase in Ista, taking several leaves in order to reconnect with family in Boll, unable to stay for long periods of time, feeling the intruder. The realization of Aadi being adopted into a family made Tahira realize she had essentially been replaced, providing a further gap between she and her kin emotionally, though perhaps in a crude twist Hira was able to lay claim to a previous lover of Aadi’s, taking something from her and striking a balance in Hira’s mind.

Eventually Tahira returned to Ista, traveling out to Fort Weyr to visit her sister occasionally as well as speak to a few of the women (including one child) who were connected to Aodien.

Life returned to as normal as life could be until a fateful meet up with one G’dal and his bond Fanneth. As of now she is a Candidate for Hestiaths’ and Kayths clutch at Fort Weyr.

She now lives in a snow tent in the gardens at FW. Life never ceases. Nor does absurdity.

Personality

Due to the trauma suffered over the five turns her brain was forced to adapt or die, other personalities were spawned in order to protect Tahira. A dissociative state led to the split where emotions were compartmentalized and Tahira became Sparrow (a name given to her by her Master, the pirate who took her) who was less combative than Tahira herself and incredibly compliant, shyness and a tendency to blush. A secondary personality arose at times of extreme stress to take over who was unnamed until Tahira discovered her family and the personality took the name Hira. Violent and calculating this secondary personality is the one utilized when the girl was forced to protect herself, either against her perpetrators or fellow captive members, essentially arising as the ‘protective’ personality, whereas Sparrow was the ‘submissive’ personality.

The primary personality, Tahira herself, was hidden away to protect her from the trauma that was enacted upon her and around her. She recalls very little detail of her actual experience on the ship, though there are moments of disturbing clarity due to certain smells or gestures by individuals about her. Some dreams haunt her, residuals of buried memories fighting their way out in order to be recognized and assist with the healing process. These memories and questions relating to them are a cause of a rift between Tahira and her siblings, leading her to feel disconnected from them and not quite a member of the family. This disconnect makes her feel extremely uncomfortable and as a result she feels an overwhelming need to attach herself to her Twin sister in order to feel as if she belongs somewhere. Worry about smothering her sister however keeps her from visiting Taini as much as she would wish to, even with the birth of a child.

The personalities still exist, however they do not ‘fight’ for inclusion, and they do not specifically name themselves when present. They are simply extensions of Tahira’s personality and come about when needed. This may be marked by a personality change, a moment of indecision or in times of great stress. Tahira has worked since escaping to Ista on overcoming her base reactions to situations, including not erupting in terrifying violence on others with the intent to kill, or cowering down completely to be frozen in a terrified stupor.

At times she can be extremely uncomfortable with the emotions that come over her in certain situations, forced to think hard about her actions and whether they are an overreaction to a comparatively mild situation. She has a hard time trusting people and assumes for the most part that promises will be broken; simply letting those promises go by unfulfilled as discontent poisons in her chest until she breaks. This will lead to overreactions if too many promises go unfulfilled, even for simple promises such as ‘I promise I’ll get you a sweetroll’, which for your average person wouldn’t be a serious issue, however to Tahira these things eventually shatter her.

She’s fiercely loyal, almost to a fault, but is easily turned against individuals if they break her trust or pose a direct threat to her. Awkward in some social situations and blossoming in others, it’s hard to pin down what wind directs her moods on any given day though she will usually opt for coldly mute if having a particularly bad day. However if your name is Taini, Hira will almost always spill everything in one harried sentence then move on to ‘How’s the babe?’ in the next breath. She is desperate to talk about her experiences, the ones she remembers, to find someone who understands or can even offer her a way out of her inner despair, however this has yet to occur and she only offers tenuous glimpses into her experiences, often inappropriately glib about such things as if they weren’t that big of a deal.

She will continue to be confused about who she is and her own wants and desires until something just clicks. This hasn’t happened as of yet, despite meeting many people and even falling in love. Nothing is concrete enough to allow her to relax. Too many things have changed in her absence and the pace at which Pern moves leaves her very little reprieve. She feels battered about by the wanton storms of Pern and unable to find a firm grounding.

Adding to the annoyance of her issues she also carries that annoying genetic annoyance of being claustrophobic and as a result is unable to stay the night at her sisters Weyr ever, bargaining rides back to Ista after short visits.

Overall Tahira can either be incredibly pleasant or coldly humorous. The ranges in between depend upon any given factor, completely randomized.

Significant relationships

Taini

Twin sister to Tahira. Tahira was born ten minutes after Taini, making her technically the youngest out of the siblings. Taini went backwhen and gained even more age on Tahira, the girls no longer sharing the same Turnday. Tahira is still not sure how a Turnday could be altered but she doesn’t question this. Simply believes this is another attempt by Taini to further distance herself from Tahira, especially after Tahira offered to change her own Turnday to match with her sisters.

This relationship is strained at times due to the length of time Tahira was gone and other factors including the adopting of Aadi into the family. Tahira still feels a connection to her sister however and struggles with trying to rekindle the close relationship they had prior to her abduction. There have been some small strides, including an experiment with cookie baking.

Verdict: Still her sister, always will be.

Maylene

Maylene is one of Tahira’s closest friends despite Maylene knowing little to nothing about the woman herself. Maylene was befriended in Tahira’s first days at the Broken Staircase, known to Maylene as Sparrow. Even with the subsequent revelation of Tahira’s true identity, Maylene still calls her Sparrow both out of habit and a constant reminder to Tahira about her humble beginnings at the Staircase. Their friendship is based upon their mutual respect for each other, Hira having looked upon her as a mother figure in the first Turn of her work there. The relationship has altered very little, aside from a realization she’s working with a Barlord and the knowledge of their propensity towards bad tempers.

Maylene is one of the few people Tahira might confide in, however she has confided very little in the woman as of yet.

Verdict: Fun person to work with, good for humorous stress relief on shift.

Thaddeus, T'jano, et al.

Tahira's relationship with her brothers is fairly non-existent. Conversations tend to stay on the surface though Tahira does specifically avoid T'jano due to his propensity to ask questions about her time with the Pirates. She loves her brothers but time away from them has created a gap she's still getting used to. Wants to rekindle relationships but afraid to do so.

Verdict: Family is family, but the males of the family don't exactly make it easy to talk to them. Read: Need tons of booze.

Aodien

Tahira’s first love since her return to solid land. Shares similar experiences to hers and was the first one she trusted enough to share her past experience with the pirates, or rather the fact she was with the pirates previously. She rushed into this relationship, finding strength in it as well as a pseudo-acceptance of herself and her past, and is now questioning whether or not Aodien is truly the one for her given his menagerie of women that came before her, and his inability to let them go. However in the same tone she is unable to let go of him, not finding enough cause to do as yet as he’s ‘chosen’ her, and only her, this leading her to believe he may be able to honor his word.

On that note she is fully expecting to get screwed over by Aodien, literally and figuratively, and keeps herself somewhat dissociated from the possible realities of Aodien himself. A glimmer of hope exists which allows her to keep her emotions free to him as opposed to completely cutting him off from her emotionally.

Verdict: Love of her life, easily. Tormentor as well. Easy to dispose of if he crosses her given half of Pern wants him dead. She figures she'll get a light sentence, either way.

Marryn

Marryn, in a word, is a pain in Hira's ass. She can't stand his smirking smile, however his involvement in her family affairs and holder of much needed information in her quest to kill everyone involved in her capture means he plays an important role in her current affairs.

However given the chance she'd clock him one to wipe that smile off his face. Tahira has absolutely no issue with showing him how incompetent his Guards are as well as how unprepared for attacks he is.

Verdict: Lucky she's no longer in Boll.

Aadi

Tahira wouldn't consider Aadi/Dia to be a significant figure in her life, however Veronika's recruitment of Aadi to test Tahira's skills has led to these two becoming oddly dependent upon each other in the coming days. Their fighting styles differ but eventually it was discerned that Tahira would indeed be able to handle herself in a situation, the woman cleared to become part of the overall plot to bring down the Pirates.

Tahira developed a small crush on Aadi, if only because their fighting styles are complementary to each other, though it does help that the other woman is equally as aggressive as Tahira as well as adept.

The tension that was there as a result of Aodien has lessened somewhat and Tahira feels more at ease around this particular person.

Verdict: Victim of an awkward girl crush. Could be worse.

Tessas and Tanev

Tahira's parents. Awkward at best. Mothers memory is going and her father enjoys ignoring situations and pretending absolutely nothing happened. Not much contact with either set, though Tahira gravitates more to her mother when she is in Boll.

Verdict: Mother thinks you're a mango and your father pretends you're still 16 and never disappeared. Mindhealer, anyone?

Hephtus

This wouldn't be a significant anything if Hira didn't have an utterly morbid curiosity about the lazy Smith. She is determined to know more about this mysterious man, his ape-like appearance not a detriment to her personal mission. She finds his quiet nature lulling and so far enjoys their short conversations. Also tickled he chose to call his acquired firelizard Trigger, despite her having had no real influence on the name.

Verdict: Likely to become a victim of Hira's insane need to give him a makeover.

Umi

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Tahira's green firelizard, privately known as the breast warmer. Umi is for the most part completely useless, spoiled silly by Tahira and content to live out her life in her bonds tops. She is being forced, slowly, to acknowledge a deeper purpose as letter carrier by Tahira. Plenty of sweets make these slave-like chores tolerable by the green.

Verdict: Likely to deliver messages where they shouldn't be, creating havoc. The wheel turns as it always has. And Umi will be it's navigator.

Hunter

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Tahira's puppy from her brother Thaddeus. Pain in her ass but has no fear when it comes to attacking dragons. Useless against dragons but has a fire in him Hira's glad to have. Loves to run, eat, and poo. Super adorable.

Verdict: Has learned not to nose at his own poop, but will still eat unknown things off the ground. Still in the gross puppy stage but lovable nonetheless.

Livejournal for Tahira: http://weesparrow.livejournal.com/

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